The Past, The Present, and The Future

Time is a relative thing, right? It can go so fast, so slow, and it also can go so embarrassing quickly while also going so embarrassing slowly. It can make a joke out of you at a moments notice and it can also make a champion out of you at a moments notice. Time seems to be about everything that matters in life. The problem is that you never know how to get a grasp of it and just slow it down or speed it up because it never strays, never stops, never whines or complains. It just can sit there staring you in the face, in the gut, in the heart, or right straight in the middle of your eyes. Time can seem to stand still, and then one minute or even one second later it seems like it's just back to ticking away. It might give you a nice pleasant nod ever once in a while, or it might just stop by to punch you in the gut for a while, but what I have figured out is that time plays no favorites. It can love you or hate you at any present moment. You need to meet a deadline, it's there; you need a minute to catch your breath after life just blows you away in the best way, oh wait there goes your minute. No matter what, no matter how hard you try you just can't seem to beat this riddle, this joker, the one thing that never changes is time. How ironic is that? The one thing that never changes is time. Destiny waits for no one right, well let's get cracking at this destiny thing, because we are definitely running out of time to make it happen.

Thank you for your listening,

Your ever faithful friend on this crazy journey we call life,

Brian Robert Gardner  

"Lightning could strike"

I have recently discovered that I have a talent for singing, so I just wanted to write a post on the topic of finding out new things, and discovering great gifts even a bit later in life. No matter who you are or how old you are, I know it is easy to stop getting excited about things in this life. But I am a living testament to the fact that there is always room for surprises and great gifts to come even when you least expect it, in a hopeless place, or just generally down the line and later in life. But I am here to tell you that no matter what or who you are, and no matter what your circumstances are, you can still pursue all your dreams, passions, gifts, talents, and just generally those things you have always regretted not taking that chance on in life. There is a great quote from the equally great film, "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button," that states: “For what it’s worth: it’s never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the courage to start all over again.” This quote sums up my point entirely. I have been dancing since the age of 12, but not until a couple of years ago did I pick up the talent for and start truly dancing in the form of ballet. It has been a wild ride, but I am so glad I was and am able to say that I found these two great art forms of ballet and music, in the form of singing and a little bit of piano, a little bit later in life. Even though they have been there the whole time, having played piano for 6 years earlier in life and have been dancing since 12, it's just great to have that release to go to throughout the day and be able to express myself creatively, athletically, passionately, artistically, and individually. But I don't want to talk just about myself, so I am genuinely pleading with everyone to always be open to new opportunities, to always take life as it comes at you, and to never, ever stop believing in yourself, and in the notion, "hey why not me?!" Always search for the greater meaning, and never stop looking for opportunities to broaden  your horizon, and hey maybe one day you'll end up discovering something about yourself you never thought possible. Just stay open to it, because to borrow a quote from another Brad Pitt movie, "lightning could strike," at any time.

Thank you for listening

Your ever faithful friend on this crazy journey we call life

Brian Robert Gardner

Fall is upon us ...

A new season, a new start, a new beginning. Summer is ending, schools are starting, a fresh start. The winds are coming in, and that is why I wanted to write this post today. A message of hope to begin your day is what this blog is all about, and now is the time for hope. Fall beginning, summer ending, a new day is dawning. Let us all strive to reach a little further, to reach out and help another, to always and never stop hoping for that day when all shall be well. A fresh start is all we need to start again, and never stop hoping, never stop believing for that day when the Master shall say "Well done thou good and faithful servant, thou has been faithful over a few things, I will now make thee ruler over many things enter into the joy of the Lord."

Some of my favorite quotes

• Do I Dare Disturb the Universe? T. S. Eliot
• "Time for you to come on out the shadows Junuh. Time for you to choose.; I cant.; Yes, you can, but you aint alone. Im right here with ya. Ive been here all along. Now play the game. Your game, the one that only you was meant to play. The one that was given to you when you come into this world. You ready? Come on, take your stance. Strike that ball Junuh, dont hold nothing back, give it everything. Nows the time, let yourself remember, remember your swing, thats right Junuh. Settle yourself, lets go. Now is the time Junuh.

Bagger Vance: The Legend of Bagger Vance

• Father Hibbert: "Before I met that young man I didn't believe in much of anything. But now I'm starting to think that one day when my time is up, God is going to ask me, George did you ever put it on the line? Did you ever not know and still jump? Did you ever just close your eyes and let go? And right now my answer would be no, I never did. So I am closing my eyes..."
• Saint Ralph
• "Because I can't. I... had an experience... I can't prove it, I can't even explain it, but everything that I know as a human being, everything that I am tells me that it was real! I was given something wonderful, something that changed me forever... A vision... of the universe, that tells us, undeniably, how tiny, and insignificant and how... rare, and precious we all are! A vision that tells us that we belong to something that is greater then ourselves, that we are *not*, that none of us are alone! I wish... I... could share that... I wish, that everyone, if only for one... moment, could feel... that awe, and humility, and hope. But... That continues to be my wish."
• Ellie Arroway: Contact 
• "Love is passion, obsession, someone you can't live without. If you don't start with that, what are you going to end up with? Fall head over heels. I say find someone you can love like crazy and who'll love you the same way back. And how do you find him? Forget your head and listen to your heart. I'm not hearing any heart. Run the risk, if you get hurt, you'll come back. Because, the truth is there is no sense living your life without this. To make the journey and not fall deeply in love - well, you haven't lived a life at all. You have to try. Because if you haven't tried, you haven't lived." 
• William Parrish: Meet Joe Black
• "Should I be afraid?"..."Not a man like you":
• Meet Joe Black
• "Lightning could Strike": 
• Meet Joe Black
• "What will your verse be?": 
• Mr. Keating in Dead Poets Society, 
• Quoting Walt Whitman
• "All you experience in the course of your life, all you observe and think, all that makes you happy or unhappy, all your regrets or satisfactions, all your love or hate, all you long for or avoid, all your achievements and failures, all you brought with you into this life at birth -your temperament, abilities, inclinations etc., all are part of the region of your so called subconscious depths. There being forgotten by you, or never known to you they undergo the process of being purified of all egotism. They become feelings per se. Thus purged and transformed, they become part of the material from which your Individuality creates the psychology, the illusory "soul" of the character."
• Michael Chekhov: To the Actor

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Quotes to live by

Get busy living, or get busy dying

Life

Life is a series of doors. A decision here, a decision there, but all that really matters is that we choose. Just make a decision and if it doesn't quite work out, and then come back out and choose door number two. We have to be bold enough to just make a choice, and I promise if it doesn't work out, you'll come out the other side. The wise man is bold, and makes a decision and goes for it, the unwise man stands outside the door and waits for it to be opened. We must decide right now to open that door, and jump into the deep end, and start swimming. There is no two ways about it, keep going into the deep end, and I promise eventually you will be a better person because you decided to take a chance on this crazy journey we call life.

Sincerely yours,

Brian Gardner

Begin Again

Life springs eternal. Hope is alive and well. There is nothing to fear but fear itself. Live fearlessly, live hopefully, always remembering that everything will be made alright in the end, and if it is not the end then it is not alright. Always know things work out in mysterious ways. But also know according to Einstein the simplest answer tends to be the truth. This blog is about hope, and that is my message for today. No matter how bad things get always know they will get better. I promise you from the bottom of my heart. There are hard things, and there are easy things, but again back to Einstein who said all we have to do is ask ourselves is this a friendly universe? And the answer of course is yes! We hope, we live, we yearn, and we seek again to believe in this ever growing future of this wonderful universe!

Thank you!

B-ri

My hero

I have one person to thank for my life: and that is my dad. I cannot say enough good things about him. I owe him everything. I could go on and on but all I know is this: without him I would not be alive today. He is my ultimate hero. He is the reason I am alive today. Thank you dad.

Love,

Your son,

Brian

The Goo Goo Dolls "Iris"

My favorite band to listen live has and always will be the Goo Goo Dolls. A close second being the Dave Mathews band. I am a child of the ninety's and my older sisters influenced me pretty good on those bands. The Goo Goo Dolls never cease to amaze me especially when they are singing their smash hit and classic balled "Iris." It also happens to be written as the title song for the hit movie "City of Angels," which also happens to be one of my favorite films. I love the scene when Nicolas Cage's character comes out of the shower and raises his arms and then cuts the pear, it's wonderful to see him really feeling what it is like to be alive after being on the other side for so long. The title song has always been a favorite of mine. The first stanza goes like this:

And I'd give up forever to touch you
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't wanna go home right now

I don't ever want to go home after one of their concerts. The song touches me to my core because it was one of my brother's favorite songs, and I love their music because it always sends message of peace and hope. From "Better days," to "Black Balloon" to "Broadway," there music will always instill you with a sense of well being,  a sense that everything will be made alright in the end, and if it is not alright, then it definitely is not the end. Johnny Resnik is one of the greatest singer song writers of our time in my opinion. Every song has meaning, and every song can touch you to the core no matter what mood you are in, no matter what you are doing, just listen to one of their songs, and everything can and will change in an instant. As long as you believe that their is something greater than yourself out there, no matter what you believe, whether it be your own future self, or a higher power, there is nothing greater in this universe than faith. Have a little faith in yourself to see beyond yourself and always look forward to the day when everything will made alright; it may be sooner than you think. And most of the time it comes when your not thinking about or waiting for it, but not always. There is a time and a place for everything. A time to happy, a time to live and a time to love, a time to yearn, a time for peace, and a time for all suffering to end. Everything can and will change in one moment. One day, one night, one morning, one hope, one anything that will make you will help you to put the past behind you and start to live your dreams. Speaking of Nicolas Cage, he has been quoted as saying that music, can and will be the highest art form there is in the world. I tend to agree with him. Because music is something that can change things in that one moment, that one instant, that one fateful day when everything seems to come together, you definitely can sense a rhythm and rhyme to it, everything just seems to flow after that change in the atmosphere and it is usually when you choose to submit to that moment and learn to give in to the universe, and stop trying so hard then it just seems to flow better when you subconsciously and consciously decide to make that change in your life. Nicolas Cage has also said that for an actor or an artist it is not always about being happy or sad, it is just about succumbing to whatever you feel in that moment, and by just letting it flow and using whatever energy or feeling or atmosphere that seems to feel or fit the moment. As an actor myself I tend to agree with this notion that most artists seem to agree on, that if you are having a long day, and things are not going right, or you just tired, it's either you fake till you make it, or you just submit to the moment and just let it be, or basically just use whatever you are feeling that day or that time to make whatever you are doing or performing better. There is a moment in time when your paradigm and intention can change and things will start to feel better, or you may already be happy and living your dreams, but if your not we all know that we must make that change in our minds and in our hearts to one day stop hoping and start living, do you know when that day is? It is right now.

Thank you for listening,

Your ever faithful friend on this up and down, crazy, wonderful journey we call life.

Brian Gardner

"We are all imitators" Aristotle

As I continue my journey throughout the ups and downs of this crazy thing we call life, I am wondering many things. So I want to write about some of them, meaning I want to write about all of the thoughts and things that keep rolling and rolling over and over again in my mind as I attempt to go to sleep, the things which won't stop until I basically just give up and turn my head over onto the pillow and force myself to get to sleep in the wee hours of the morning. So here we go, I will attempt to put them into words on this blog. First of all, I am wondering where the original things, the innovators, and all of the people who we revere and study all of the time in our schools and in our lives have gone? Aristotle has said basically said that we are all imitators, but I am wondering who are we truly imitating, ourselves, I don't actually know, but yes to a point that is absolutely true. But why in this lifetime and in this generation and at this time on the earth are we not even trying to attempt or obviously not completing our own classics, our own brand of history makers, and so on. We read The Great Gatsby as obviously one of the great American novels of all time, and then we make movies and films based on the book, and have parties with themes of The Great Gatsby novel and yet why are we not writing our own great classic novels and having our own original themed movies and parties? A great poet once said that life is just history replaying itself over and over again, the same themes, the same things, the same truths, heartaches, victories, excitements, and yet why is that, how does everything basically keep replaying itself over and over? Maybe because we are afraid to find our truths and our own joy, and even our own history? (Side note: The film Contact starring Jodie Foster was one of my favorite movies growing up and still is one of my favorite films to this day, because it touches on all of these themes and truly foreshadows the exact things that are happening in this day and age, in this time on earth. All of the questions asked in the film are based on the theories and findings of the great Carl Sagan and they ring so true and go all the way to the whys of the eternal nature of our own existence. The film shows how the search for truth is how we are all connected, how science and God intertwine and the film really gives us all a sense of what we are truly looking for in this lifetime.) Anyway how true is that, how honest and revealing that is, because it is just so true that we are all imitators. We are just replaying the same themes and going through life in just the same way everyone ever has and yet it seems like we have stopped creating the classics; that one day a hundred years from now we will still be reading the same books, still reading The Great Gatsby or will we finally one day create our own legacies and classics? Will we ever create new material to read, to watch, to finally somehow let the past go and again create our own future, and then become those people that the future people of this earth will imitate? Or will we just keep making sequels, reliving the past, keep recreating Shakespeare plays or will we come up with and become our own Shakespeare's, our own F. Scott Fitzgerald's, and create our own classics? What are we waiting for, yes a lot of people are doing a lot of great things with technology and art and athletics, but it seems like that no one is going to beat Michael Jordan, even though Michael himself has stated that as long as evolution exists that there will be somebody greater who will come along and beat his records and out do his athletic achievements. Where also is the next Baryshnikov, Nureyev, Nijinsky? Yes there is Stiefel, Acosta, Corella, but we have all these people saying that we are losing something, as we are going forward. Stiefel wants to create new ballets, and yet all we see is Swan Lake and Cinderella! David Howard was a great classical ballet teacher, and he has stated in an interview I just watched that took place in 2008, before he passed away, the same thing Ethan Steifel was and the same thing I am trying to put across in my own words right now. Even though we are moving forward each day, it seems like things are changing for dancers, actors, athletes, poets, musicians, and all people and artists in general. The great actor and the great acting teacher Michael Chekhov also has warned us that this was going to happen in his classic book "To the Actor, On the Technique of Acting" which by the way was light years ahead of his time when he wrote it and he was talking about things concerning energy, atmosphere, and basically the law of attraction before anyone knew what exactly these things were, and before anyone knew how this was going to all play out. Basically he warned us that the arts were changing and if we didn't watch ourselves and carefully examine and reexamine where we were all headed and what we were doing, that we were going to be caught in the snare we our caught in now, which was what David Howard was basically saying when it was and still is happening. Anyway, the dancers, the actors, the musicians, the poets, the writers, and the athletes have all become way too naturalistic or way too obsessed with the past in certain ways. Baryshnikov has always said it was not about "being the best," by the way no on has ever started to do something for just the pure reason of being the best, they wanted to do it because they loved it and they did it to better themselves everyday, the best set out on journey because they were talented and they put in the work, and when you do that you can and will become a genius and be at the top of your craft if things go your way, and things work out as explained by the classic author Malcolm Gladwell in his own classic book "Outliers," ironically in both ways because the book may end up being something we read in one hundred years, but the most ironic part about it is that the book is explaining and examining all of the ins and outs of how people end up on top of the world, rich, successful, even extremely famous because of their lucky breaks and the time and place these people were in that allowed them to go all the way to the top of their field and life, instead of just living lives of just "quiet desperation," like most people do as explained by a famous poet. Anyway the point that I am trying to make and started to do and went away from into other areas of discussion, is that even though our lives are moving forward it seems like we are standing still or just waiting for Armageddon to come and somehow save us all from this life that has gotten so out of whack and so complicated for no apparent reason other than the fact that we have somehow lost our way, and we are hoping for the Savior to come again and fix everything that has gone astray and fix everything that seems so much like a life and a world that has gotten way off track and needs to find it's way again. Anyway, we need new inventors, new innovators, new classic books, new films, movies, ballets, new Michael Jackson's and Jordan's and Shakespeare's, and Fitzgerald's. Where have we gone? It seems like we gone away of the social network. We have bombarded ourselves with ways to leave reality and fake our way through our own lives and existences that it seems like we need something or someone to come along and change things and create new things for the betterment of our own society. We can look back to move forward, but for goodness sake we have had enough Transformer's sequels, and enough Nutcracker performances to last us a lifetime. Let us pick ourselves up, and I am one hundred percent including myself in this plea to the world, and get going on and start creating and inventing, and imaging a new world. A world full of hope and goodness and happiness, instead of every news story being so completely negative that it seems like we have all just thrown our hands up in the air and said I give up, you win evil doers of this world. Where have all the positive, uplifting, mind blowing original works of this time and this future gone? We have read enough of To Kill a Mockingbird and The Great Gatsby, we have done so many Shakespeare plays and so many Giselle's, that it is finally time to stop imitating, and become our own imitators. Yes, again we can look to the past to look to the future, but it's time to move forward into a new generation of art and literature and beauty and hope, and look forward to the new beginnings of time and I'll just say it straight up never look back, always keep our eyes and lives moving forward and never stop dreaming and or believing that one day, maybe sooner than you would think or ever even imagine that our lives will become one where we have stopped hoping and started living.

Thank you for listening to my message of hope for today, see you on the flip side, your ever faithful friend on this journey we call life.

Brian Robert Gardner

Faith and Life

Have faith in yourself. Believe in something greater than yourself. Go beyond this world's limitations and fight for something greater. Do not be afraid to dream big. If you find yourself not knowing what to do, just move forward and I promise the answer will come to you. If you lose, you'll come back, and I promise one day you'll win. There's no greater failure than not to at least try; give yourself a shot, there's no use standing on the sidelines anymore. Get yourself in the game by any means necessary. Don't hold back ever. Leave it all out there on the floor. Don't waste your time worrying about what others will think or even do, just go for it; stick to your gut and you will never lose. Have hope, faith, and charity, be good to one another. We are all in this game we call life together. We all breath the same air, we all are striving for the same things, so let's begin again everyday with that unyielding attitude of gratitude and never stop hoping or dreaming because maybe one day those dreams will come true. We have nothing to fear but fear itself. Cards on the table, bet big and one day you will take the house. Odds may be slim, but just ask yourself everyone every once in a while, or maybe all the while, why not me?

Thank you,

B-ri.

Of Love and Hope: The things we cherish most

    As we all set out on this journey called life, and as we all go throughout our days, let us always remember that we are all on this crazy journey together. All we have is each other and that is all we may need to bother to remember. Instead of being angry with one another, let us look toward the stars and towards love and go forward in faith together never ceasing to remember that we all come from the same source; we are all brothers and sisters, and we are all searching for the same thing everyday. And if all we did was reached as far as could and looked inside of ourselves and found our human sides and hearts we could and will always find the only truth that really matters: and that is the fact that we are always searching for something and we are usually doing it together. Whether that day it is the truth or love or we are just searching for some glimmer of hope to keep us going to get us to our next destination in this life, we must remember that the best and most often place the Lord will answer our prayers is through another person just like ourselves! Friendship, hope, love, the things we yearn for everyday are right their for the taking! We must dare to disturb the universe, and though we may be lacking in our Prince Hamlet like stature, and though we may be the fool or the Polonius of our own lives, we must always know that we may be lacking in self confidence at times, even Hamlet himself, mostly all the time, or we may be the fool, that is the point of all this: That we are all just faking it, we are all frail, and we all may be scared or make unwise decisions, we are all human. And though Hamlet was the Prince, look at Polonius and some of Shakespeare's other great folly filled characters, they all hold some of the great qualities and most oft quoted lines of our lives and of the most quoted playwright of all time. Anyway to reach farther and move away from some of my favorite poets and authors, Shakespeare and T.S. Eliot, let us take a look at another great and oft quoted poet Mr. Walt Whitman: 

    

    Of myself forever reproaching myself, (for who more foolish than I, and who more faithless?) ... The question, O me! so sad, recurring—What good amid these, O me, O life?

                     Answer.

    That you are here—that life exists and identity,

    That the powerful play goes on, and you may contribute a verse.

  

    We all have something to offer, we all are here for a reason, so let's just figure out what it is and go and do it! Whether it be to change the world or just our homes, the small and simple things can and will make a difference. For my message of hope today, I offer one final thought: Keep going, keep pushing, you never know when a mundane thought or message, or another mundane Tuesday could change your life. All I am saying is to stay open, you never know when lightning could strike.

    Thank you for listening to my musings,

    Your ever faithful friend on this journey,

     Brian Robert Gardner

    

"Happiness is good health and a bad memory"

"Happiness is good health and a bad memory," the great Ingrid Bergman has been quoted as saying. I wholeheartedly agree! Bergman, a Chekhov disciple herself, is great in the film Spellbound with the great Gregory Peck and of course Michael Chekhov himself as Dr. Burloff. It is a Hitchcock film and it is a wonderful thriller! I would recommend it to anyone interested in seeing classic film making and acting at it's best! I also was just watching the incredible classic film Elia Kazan's On the Waterfront starring Marlon Brando and Eva Marie Saint the other night, which won an incredible eight academy awards including one for the great Brando himself and I believe Eva Marie Saint's performance as well as best picture. Anyway two other classic films to check out, another Kazan classic starring the always passionate and wonderfully talented James Dean as a young Cal Trask in the Steinbeck adapted novel East of Eden, "I don't know where he is, I'm not my brother's keeper," with a more lighthearted and fitting ending than in the novel and of course the bible itself. Dean's, Chekhov's, and Brando's performances are all brilliant, and I have to mention the great Montgomery Clift's performance in the gigantic silver screen classic, and a personal favorite of mine, now cemented in my brain, the film A Place in the Sun directed by the great George Stevens. Interestingly enough Brando said there was no way Clift wouldn't for his performance at the Oscars and while Brando actually voted for Clift for the award, Clift did the same for his friend Brando in another Kazan classic "A Streetcar Named Desire," in which Brando did end up winning for his ferocious performance as Stanley Kowlaski. So we go from "Stella!!!!!!!!!! to "I could of been a contender," to Montgomery Clift's scene stealing performance as George Eastman, In a Place in the Sun, where his character meets the wonderfully beautiful and fabulous Elizabeth Taylor's character for the first time, and the look and glance on his face will be cemented in silver screen history forever. Life imitated art in that moment, because even though Clift was gay in real life, and his character wasn't, he and and his character were mesmerized by Taylor's beauty and his face reflected himself being truly lost in the moment, and then found on the screen. Clift met the holy grail of acting in and at that moment: the truth. Clift and Taylor's screen presence are cemented as well in film history by being voted in and going down as the most physically beautiful power couple of all time to ever grace the silver screen. Anyway just wanted to share my message of hope for today in the best way I can!: through the art of film and through all of art meeting truth!

Thank you so much for listening,

Your ever faithful friend on this journey,

Brian Robert Gardner

Necessity: The key to life

Necessity may cut out the weak and uplift the strong, or it may just show you a path in life that you didn't know was there or weren't expecting to come at that time. It may just show you who you truly are, or it maybe the fact of life is that necessity rules all; and if all we need to do is look into our own soul and appeal to our human side, then that may be the final step we need to do to come to the truth. The truth of what you may ask; well the truth that if all we have left is each other, then that is all we may truly need forever.

Thank you for listening,

Brian

My brother Russell

My brother Russell had emergency brain surgery about 11 months ago. I had the privilege of being with him for 9 months of rehabilitation. Russ is truly the law of positive attraction in a bottle. In all those months with him at all the hospitals and at home I never heard him complain once. Not once. Not a why me? Not a anything. It was truly impressive to watch his progress from day one to where he is now; which is back at school where he has one year left on his masters of accounting at Brigham Young University, where this program continually ranks in the top three each year among all schools and colleges in the U.S. After Russell's two year mission in Brazil I truly saw a change in him, a change for the better. He learned how to work so hard and is now on path to getting married and his degree and I'm betting a wonderful life together with his soon to be wife Melissa. He still has to go a little bit farther in his rehabilitation but he is sure on his way. Anyway the point of this story and for today's message of hope, I just wanted to share with you the power of persistence and the power of positive thinking. And that is Russ. If you truly believe you will get better and be healed you will be. If you put out what you want from the universe and consistently strive towards it everyday you will get what you want. I have seen it in action. It was quite amazing to watch my younger brother teach me one of the greatest lessons of life. With his positive thinking and mindset nothing could stop him and nothing will. He had surgery to heal his tumor for good and let's hope it stays that way. Anyway as we continually search for answers in this world and from the universe about the why's and how's of life all we have to ask is one simple question is what Albert Einstein has said and that is this: Is this a friendly universe? And in spite of it all if we do truly believe that we will always be fine. No matter what happens here or there if we consistently strive to thrive in all circumstances no matter what is going on around us, and we always have the power of our own mind, just like as spoken about in book after book after book, especially in Man's Search for Meaning and As a Man Thinketh, you can overcome being in Auschwitz Concentration Camp in WWII and survive and be able to tell your story to millions and change people's lives always knowing that we can overcome almost anything by the power of pure will power. Obviously there are circumstances here and there, but I truly hope and believe that no matter what happens everything will be made right in the end. And if it hasn't been made right then it isn't the end. Keep striving, searching, hoping, yearning, keep going, keep rolling your boulder everyday whatever that may be, and I mean that in a good way not in as a punishment from the Gods, but always remember to dare to disturb the universe and fight for what you believe in. Challenge what is right and wrong, and never stop believing that no matter who you are and no matter the circumstances you have the right and willpower to change lives and maybe even the world forever. Look to the Savior and always strive to be like him no matter the circumstance. Keep hoping, keep believing, for tomorrow the sun will rise who knows what the tide could bring? Thank you so much for listening your ever faithful friend Brian Robert Gardner.

Stop Hoping and Start Living

Life is meant to be lived. Life is not meant to be spent hidden away in your room or your house. Life is meant to be experienced. We are supposed to be happy, joyful, free, and we are meant to defy gravity in all things. Overcoming fear comes with experience. Even though we have fear, we must go forward in spite of it and do whatever it is we are afraid of: that is the essence of courage. Be courageous as you seek out your hopes and dreams. We all hope for our dreams to come to true and without that hope we would have nothing. "Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and a good thing never dies." "Get busy living or get busy dying." The film Shawshank Redemption can teach us many important life lessons including those two quotes from the film right there. As we continue on in this trek and journey we call life, we must strive to thrive and live in every circumstance that maybe given to us. Not to be acted upon, but to act for ourselves. "We were not sent to this earth to fail, but to succeed gloriously." Elder Richard G. Scott of the Quorum of the twelve apostles has been quoted many times saying that exact line in his conference talks. I hope to start to experience the good parts of life, the exciting things, the hopeful things. I want to begin to really fly and live my life to the fullest no matter what. Seize the day, carpe diem to the max. I want to become in tune with the universe and flow with it everyday. I want to be one with the almighty universe and let it take me on an adventure that was and is worth fighting for and worth choosing to come down to this earth and experience all that it has to offer. We only get one of each day, so it is finally time to start to make each one of them count. No more wasted days on health problems, or anything else. Leave the gray skies of depression behind me, and fight for the light that is just waiting for me to come unto it and live in it forever. I want to stop hoping and start living! I have so many ideas, and dreams, and so many talents and skills that I need to share with the world. I want to leave this world better than it was when I found it and came upon it. I know everything will happen soon and begin soon, I just can't wait to truly start living and truly start experiencing days full of joy and happiness from sun up to sun down. There is so much out there I have missed and I only have so much time to make up for all of those missed times and experiences. I want to fall in love. I mean really fall in love, head over heels in love. My oh my how grand that would be to love someone more than you love yourself. To care for someone so much that you are willing to die for that person. What a lifetime of experiences that are just waiting for me to begin and start enjoy them piece by piece, moment by moment. There is no point in waiting any longer, just jump in the deep end and start swimming.

Do I disturb the Universe?

T.S. Eliot

The life well lived

The life well lived.A hope springs anewThe season changesA new love is foundA beginning beginsA mark of a new day dawningThe sun risesThe sun setsThe clouds partThe sun shines throughThe light spreads againAnd now we begin againThe flowers are bloomingThe trees springingThe winter cold endsThe warmth of a new season beingsSpring is upon us; with it new lives,New loves, new responsibilities, a new life to live.The thaw is melting, the grass is growing, and weStart to let the winter doldrums fade away.As we look forward to the light at the end of the tunnel,That light has now arrived, and we are basking in it;The beautiful dawn of a new day, a new hope, and a new day.Let us begin again.

The days grow old

The days grow old

The calender turns it's pages;
one by one, day by day.
We search for meaning, for love lost, for hope to be found.
We are bound by nothing, free to be and live our lives with
a new found joy for the life well lived. The hell is over,
the heaven begun. Our yearning has been fulfilled, and we once again,
are fulfilled. Our young lives our full of endless pages of new beginnings,
and yet the book is not nearly finished. The yearly pages our full of old
becoming new, new becoming reality, and dreams becoming fulfilled. We search,
yearn, hope, and yet who knows what the next page holds. There is a number at the bottom of the page but the page is filled with blank and empty lines, ready at any moment to be filled in, to become memories. Memories of a life truly lived to the utmost desire. We shall not yield ever. We shall live forever. We shall become immortal. Our fountain of youth has been dipped in twice, and we shall never fail to stop living. Not for one second, one moment, one note could change everything. We do not wait for the perfect moment, we create it, never holding on to that truth, to that one moment that could change our lives forever. We let go, and let nature take over. We dare to disturb the universe without fear and while they talk of Michelangelo we go paint our own Sistine Chapels. We don't talk about it, we just do it. We create, we live, we love, we never stop living to hope, we just turn our hopes into reality and we don't wait for our flowers to stop blooming we keep growing taller while others weep yonder a midst the wallflowers. We pull from the wall all of those who wish for better lives, and we never stop to wonder what might have been. When our lives are over our tombstones will read no regrets ever, rip forever.

Faith precedes the miracle

A dream begun. A hope fulfilled. A mystery unlocked. A life well lived. A faithful journey becoming a miracle. The way it goes, the way it flows, the way it let goes, the wind continues to blow, the rain falls, the sun shines, the earth groans, the universe smiles, the heavens open, and all begins again. The circle of life as we know it, the only thing that we know is that the truth is all that we have. Nothing less, nothing more. I believe in life, even when life didn't believe in me for a while, I never gave up on it, and I know it in my soul that it will repay me, completely and four fold. I never lost hope even during the ups and complete low downs of the mystery that we call this life's long journey. Life is about hope, redemption, not fear or lose, but faith and re-connection. We will all gather together and what was once lost shall be found, all that was once gone will be redeemed and all will bow on one knee to the Master. And I hope when my eyes are full of tears, He will ask to me arise and come forth and receive my glory next to Him and His Father and in my mansions above. Until that day I will continue to let go and live freely always knowing that if I fall He will catch me and I will rise again and be free forever.

Stop Hoping and Start Living!

The Craft of Acting

After I decided to devote my life to craft of performance art and all of it's subsidiaries, including fashion, dance, writing, and acting, I wanted to go at it full esteem ahead. I have trusted my gut so far, and I hope it all works out. But for today's message of hope, I just wanted to talk a little bit about what I learned about the craft of acting and how it can be used and can affect all of us in our everyday lives. The art of film has come to be known as all of the other art forms put together. I would agree. The first goal of an actor is to entertain. This is always the first goal, no matter what anybody says you watch television, and go to the movies and to the theater to be entertained. But if you can go beyond that as an actor, then what a special treat it is to go beyond that and find something deeper. Because if you can go beyond the entertainment, and get to the inspiration part then you have hit a gold mine. But if you can get to the almighty holy grail of art, the truth or a moment of truth, then you have really set a standard to be broken. My mentor Martin Donovan would always get us up in front of the camera and keep going after you and after you until you would or could finally come to some of moment truth before he would let you sit down. You could always see it in class, and you would say oh yep there is the perfect time to stop, and you would hear him say "and cut." It was such experience to be trained by the man who has helped and been involved in the actor's lab of training the greats such as Daniel Day - Lewis, Will Smith, Jude Law, Colin Firth, and Mark Walhberg. Martin has always been known as ahead of his time, but if I knew all of this before I started working with him at the Playhouse in West LA I probably would have bowed out sooner rather than later. I have never had to bow out with Martin because after having spent so much time training with him, he has become a friend and someone who could open a lot of doors for me in this business with our show that we have been working on for so long. Anyway, back to the message of hope, I will just share this quote from the great and most astoundingly beautiful actress Audrey Hepburn: "I am proud to have been in a business that gives pleasure, creates beauty, and awakens our conscience, arouses compassion, and perhaps most importantly, gives millions a respite from our so violent world." This sums up exactly what I mean to say; to go to the theater and to be able to finally get a rest from this world and all of it's daily ups and downs is why I go to the movies and is why I am devoting my life to them, and other types of performance art. It is the hope and the faith and the inspiration that films can give to someone to live another day, to keep going, and to not ever give up on one's dreams ever. The great Michael Chekhov said this: "They are perilously prone to forget that the real task of the creative artist is not merely to copy the outer appearance of life but to interpret life in all its facets and profoundness, to show what is behind the phenomena of life, to let the spectator look beyond life's surfaces and meanings. For is not the artist, the actor in the truest sense, a being who is endowed with the ability to see and experience things which are obscure to the average person? And is not his real mission, his joyous instinct, to convey to the spectator, as a kind of revelation, his own very impressions of things as he sees them and feels them?" Martin has taught me in the ways of Chekhov and Meisner, the ways to let go and just be in the moment. The real truth of acting, and this is where life and art I believe imitate each other and meet is that if you try too hard you are going to fail. I mean that in good way. I am not saying that you should not try, I am saying that just like from the New Testament of the Bible that the whole point of life is to lose yourself to find yourself. To give up and succumb to the moment, and to act and live in the moment in the now, is one of those wondrous things of this world. To have that relaxed concentration that you must have as an artist, actor, and performer, whether in acting or dancing, or theater acting is the key. The key is to just let go and go with the flow and the atmosphere of whatever this or that moment might have. To feel it, to just let go, and let your instinct or subconscious take over is when it really gets fun. I could get into the pure freedom of egotism that the subconscious depths have, but that is for another time. Just remember that the meaning of life, is the same as the artist's meaning: the search for truth. Once we find that truth and that love, hold onto it because it could slip away, but the key is to just keep pushing forward and holding onto that truth because tomorrow the sun will rise, who knows what it could bring?

Philip Seymour Hoffman: One of the greats.

When my brother Russell texted me the news that one of the greatest actors in the world Mr. Philip Seymour Hoffman had died today I was shocked. As I continue on in life it seems to me that I keep seeing death everywhere, and mostly at young ages. From Cory Monteith, Paul Walker, and Philip Seymour Hoffman and someone very close to me personally, I don't have any words to describe what it's like to lose a young loved one too soon. It was and still is all a haze. Every day it gets a little bit better, until something comes up to remind me of my brother Scott. A song on the radio, something, anything, can trigger memories. All I have to know is that he is ok, that he is safe, happy, and free. Free from all the problems of this world, and in a much better place. I will love him always and miss him until the time comes for me and my family to all be reunited in heaven. I feel his love, guidance and peace everywhere. He is my constant guardian, and I am so glad I had some time with him before I left the house to get to know him better and to spend more time with him. He was and is always so loving, kind, and so funny! He always made me laugh with his witty comments, and I know he struggled so much that while his death was and is tragic, I am happy to know that he is free from all the worldly things that can affect us all so much. He is my guardian angel and I know he is making progress in Heaven everyday. To lose all of these people who had so much talent that they could offer to the world is tragic. I hope and wish the best for all of them, and know the Lord's plan is perfect and that everything has to happen for a reason. A wonderful man in our church ward sang the beautiful song Bring Him Home from the greatest musical of all time Les Miserables at my brother's funeral. At first we didn't think it would fit with the circumstance but it truly did. The Lord brought him home and will bring us all home and I truly know we all will be resurrected. The Lord's Atonement always comes to my mind in times such as these. With all of these tragedies we can all know that everything will work out in the end. The Lord Jesus Christ sacrificed his life for all of us and what peace that brings to the soul, heart, and mind to know this truth and fact of life. The most ironic part is that the Lord gained the glory of the world by doing the opposite of what you would think to do. He sacrificed his life instead of the great deceiver who wanted all the selfish glory. We all should lose ourselves to find ourselves. The Lord and His Father, our Heavenly Father wants all of his children to succeed and "to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man." This is one of my favorite scriptures of all time and can be found in The Pearl of Great Price in Moses 1:39. It is powerful beyond measure to know that all the Lord wants for us in success in mortality and if we hold onto our faith and hope, and that iron rod forever, we will be brought be back into his presence cleansed and free from sin and be saved in the kingdom of God. I hope everyday for more happiness and for more happiness and joy and peace in this fallen world. Our goal is to overcome this fallen state and become one with the Lord and His perfect Gospel plan. As we all hope for success, peace, and hope in this life, and continue on our path to immortality and eternal life of man, God's greatest gift, I hope for all us in this world to have peace knowing that everything will be right and all will be rectified according to the Lord's will and sacrifice for us all. Sending peace and love to all of you my friends, I am signing off for today, and thank you for listening. Brian Robert Gardner

P.S. On a lighter note go BRONCOS!

Stop Hoping and Start Living

Everything changed for me when I was 18. I had come home from college not knowing what to do, until one day I was inspired by the Lord to take the step in a different direction and really focus on the things He wanted me to focus on including those in the arts, referring to acting, dancing, modeling, and writing. And hopefully one day directing, producing, choreographing, music, and athletics, and athletic art including ballet and hip-hop, and all others that will lead me to the Lord's will and pursue those dreams he wanted me to go after and do the things that I now want to do as well. With my eye single to glory of God, I am on the right path, a better path, no more fighting with the universe, but instead going with the flow of it, getting healthier and healthier everyday, and now truly knowing what it means to live. To live a life of dreams coming true, to make each day count, because we must always remember that we only get one of each day forever so we have to make each of them truly count. There is only one January 28, 2014 ever, so it is our duty to live it to it's fullest not looking back in fear but looking forward in faith and hope. Each passing day brings us new hope and new beginnings, and that is what this blog is all about, and why I wanted to start writing it is because of this fact, that a new day is dawning, and we cannot be like Lot's wife and look back and be turned into a grain of salt. We must always be pressing forward relying on the Lord for guidance and in faith taking one step at a time until that day we reach the top of his glory and are saved to live with Him and His only begotten Son in His kingdom of glory forever. As we look forward with that eye of hope and that eye single to glory of God, we have to not only believe, but know that good things and good times are ahead. Elder Richard G. Scott has repeatedly been quoted as saying that we are here "not to fail, but to succeed gloriously," (on this earth). As I search and yearn and continue to believe in a better tomorrow, I will also do my best to live each day in the moment of ... life. We have waited and suffered long enough. Let us each "lengthen our stride" and push forward, always knowing and believing that our dreams will come true and may already have. We have to have the right amount of faith and hope, and seize this day! Carpe diem! I hope to begin my life again everyday and search out those new beginnings, and never give up hope for that day when The Master will say: "Well done thou good and faithful servant, thou has been faithful over a few things, I will make thee a ruler of many things, enter into the joy, peace, safety, and rest of the Lord." Thank you for listening, Your ever faithful friend on this journey, Brian Gardner

The New Year is upon us ...

A Note for the Christmas Season and the New Year that is upon us:

Believe … all you have to do is believe … for unto this night and unto this world a Savior is born. His named shall be called Jesus, the Son of God, The holy one of Israel. Hallejuh! The world and all other worlds unto it are saved by and through the only begotten, even the Son of God, even Jesus Christ. His birth, his death, his atoning sacrifice shall not only save us all, but will give unto all those who believe in Him, the greatest of all gifts, the gift of eternal life. To bring to pass the perfection of us all, to guide us into his presence, seek ye the Kingdom of God and all things shall be brought unto it and unto the Lord’s peace and into his eternal safety and His arms of eternal joy forever. The immortality and eternal life of His children is His main goal and my oh my what peace it brings to the soul knowing that everything will be made right in the end.

The Lord’s way is the only way … the only way to eternal life. Love, live, laugh, hope, pray, believe, never stop hoping for that day when He shall say unto you: “Peace be still and know that I am God, the only begotten of the Lord, and I will give you your rest; for my yoke is easy and my burden is made light through you.” The day will soon come when all is made right, and the will and light of the Lord will shine brightly from your heart and you will know you are safe and the Lord loves you completely, without fault and without error, ye may know the “truth of all things.” Ye may know that the Book of Mormon is the word of God and that all things will be right again in all of our lives unto those who believe in Him. The Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end, the light that shines within all of us and burns brightly this Christmas season and into the wonderful new year, full of resolutions and new responsibilities and full of new hope and new beginnings.

It is the New Year that is quickly coming upon us, and yet we must never forget the spirit of Christmas is also upon us in all the hearts of those choose to believe and who will believe again. A time to reflect and a time to cherish the year that was, and a time to look forward to the year and the years ahead. What a time this is, as we look back and wonder what might have been and cherish the life and love of one who has passed on, who watches from afar, yet how close he is to our hearts. May his memory live on and his life be cherished forever. He is our guardian angel, he looks after us and pushes us along and may even have saved the life another loved one this past year. We love, hope, and yearn for the best this time of year never forgetting the year that was and the years that will ever be wondrous. We must never forget to live in the moment and never forget our blessings and the tender mercies the Lord has given us and will continue to give us if we only continue to choose to believe in Him and cherish the mystery of life and death. The eternal plan of happiness goes on every day leading we can only hope to the afterlife full of joy and happiness. We search, yearn, hope, and live this plan everyday relishing in the pleasure of joy that besets us and is given us with each passing moment, note, sunrise and sunset. A new day is truly dawning in our lives. As we set the sun on what once was and look yonder and begin anew let us all take a moment and remember what once was and what will be again. The hope in our hearts will truly become alive again and truly the sun will rise again. We put our hope in the Savior and truly hope that the best is yet to come. Looking for joy, we once again have a chance to believe. To believe most especially in the miracle that is life. The chance to continue living until we are called home, to make each day count from now on, to never miss a beat, and to always look forward with the eye of faith and our eye single to the glory of God. I am signing off for now but thank you for listening to the beat of my heart and the stroke of my pen. Best wishes, happy holidays, a merry Christmas, and a very, very happy New Year! Sending all of my love and best wishes again from your ever faithful brother and son, and always will be your friend.

Brian Robert Gardner